About Me

About essentially broken

The Story Behind Essentially Broken

I’m Connie, a mom, wife, daughter, friend, and sister (at least I used to be, I guess I still am.)  Essentially Broken was started to share how I went from devastated to driven after my only sister, my best friend, the best aunt to my girls, killed herself without warning.

 

My Mission

I want to be the change I want in this world.  Fighting tirelessly to improve suicide prevention programs in schools around the US.  Schools seem to only spring to action after a tragedy has happened, bringing in grief counselors and talking about the signs they missed.  Schools need to start taking a proactive approach to suicide as opposed to a reactive approach.  Communities offer anti-drug and bullying programs, suicide prevention programs should go hand in hand with them.  Schools should be teaching not only “book learning” but emotional intelligence also.  I have a new goal, it’s to create a national formal emotional intelligence package that I will offer to schools, communities, and parents. Teaching kids hope-Kids who think the only way out or to end the pain is by killing themselves.  I won’t stop until everyone knows my name, here’s why:

My sister

Jessie was all into holistic health (I accepted her BA in Holistic Health posthumously from Georgian Court College-she was 4 credits away from graduating when she died.) Anyway, she was always trying to get me to try different essential oils and some type of “snake oils” for my pain. I have fibromyalgia and degenerative disc disease so I’m in a lot of pain….all the time.  I always told her to leave me alone, saying that my prescription meds worked just fine.

In 2014 my sister gave birth to my nephew Jackson, and I thought everything was going great.  We celebrated Jackson’s 1st birthday in July of 2015.  His birthday was amazing, Jessie was frazzled but happy.  10 days later I received a phone call from my aunt saying my sister killed herself, it felt like I got ripped in half.  It was the worst thing that ever happened to me.  The first couple of days I was essentially broken. The next couple of months I didn’t leave the house because I was in denial and waiting for my sister to show up.

Essential Oils

I ordered a starter set of oils in the weeks following my sister’s death.  Then I started reading everything I could on essential oils, their chemistry, their benefits, recipes, etc. etc.  I started taking online courses about essential oils and their benefits at a different online accredited aromatherapy schools.  I started making my own beauty products-body butters, shampoo, exfoliators, etc.  Then I started making blends for my family and friends for any ailment they had and they were working.  I’m still reading and learning everyday.

Still Learning to Cope

My new thing is self help and meditation, I’m still learning how to stop my mind from racing but that’s a whole different story.  Follow me, if you dare, into the depths of despair and learn how I pulled myself out.  In my opinion, we’re all essentially broken but you’re never as alone as you think you are.  I hope it helps you to pick up your pieces.  If you or anyone you knows needs help, have them reach out to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention or National Institute of Mental Health.

Essentially broken by loss
This is my sister and I at my daughter’s kindergarten graduation. That’s me on the left and my beautiful sister Jessica on the right.

 

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